the Holy

A few years ago I was asked to teach a class. 

This request is usually followed by a question: What do you want to teach on?

I suppose it is this second question that always gets me excited. My mind starts turning and marinating and I entertain various possibilities. I usually land on something I have been called to teach on or something I think I am just overly ignorant of and simply want to learn more about. 

So, all of this thinking landing on the topic of the Holy Spirit. 

Growing up I knew of the Holy Spirit. I knew of the Biblical passages where the Spirit was mentioned and passages where characteristics of the Spirit were discussed. But when it really came down to it, I did not really know much of the Holy Spirit. 

I remember a time many years before, in which there was a discussion about whether it was right or not to worship the Holy Spirit. Initially, I felt very confused by this discussion. I didn't know. I knew a lot about God and about Jesus, but the Holy Spirit was more of an anomaly. I simply didn't know what to do with the Holy Spirit. 

So, all these many years later, I realized I was in very much the same place. I still simply didn't  know what to do with the Holy Spirit. 

So, I studied and read and learned. I read very conservative ideas, moderate ideas, and very charismatic ideas. I read books and commentaries. I read scripture and various theologians. I sat with a lot of information. I was overwhelmed and at times confused. I sat a lot in the Final Discourse of John. 

Eventually a class emerged and I felt more confident in my knowledge, but profoundly aware of my lack of relationship. 

Throughout my study I realized how much I looked at God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit separately. Yet, the more I read and studied about the Holy Spirit, I began to understand the profound importance of the trinity. I realized that my lack of understanding of the Holy Spirit had restricted my understanding of God and of Jesus, had restricted my ability to have a relationship with the trinity, and had minimized my own spirituality. 

I began to realized that my relationship with God was limited to only seeing God the Father, and Jesus the Son. I had made no space for the Holy Spirit. 

In understanding these things, I realized I needed to make space in my life to relate with and to the Holy Spirit. I realized I needed to more fully worship the Holy Spirit just as I did God and Jesus. I realized that I needed to worship God as the trinity. 

When I hear the word God, I really only think of God the Father. I realized I did not have language for the trinity. I did not use language that directed my mind and thoughts to worship of the trinity and that all my thoughts were separated to the three distinct persons. 

Understanding the need for change and the need for language was crucial in my spiritual path forward to a deeper relationship. So, I landed on the idea of the Holy. It acknowledges each of the trinity, God the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit, while making space to acknowledge all three at the same time. 

Language is important. It works to direct our thoughts, our paradigms, our life. Changing my language has allowed space for a healthier spiritual life and relationship. Changing my language has changed my life. 

Living

Praying

Worshipping

Working

Dreaming

Desiring

Learning

Growing

Talking

Studying

Eating

Thinking

Sleeping

Walking

            with the Holy. 

With

With. The dictionary defines the word with as accompanied by or accompanying. 

 

For a long time I haven't understood the idea of with. 

I understood the idea of being responsible, of being good, of being dependable. 

I understood what it meant to show up and work, to follow the rules, to be held accountable, to be dependable. 

I understood the idea of doing something for God, of being something for God. 

None of these ideas or concepts are bad. They are all filled with good intention, with a desire to strive, to prove, to work, to honor, to serve, and to encourage. And it was all done for God. 

The thing that I didn't understand then, that I understand now, is that while I thought my focus was on God, it was really on me. I was focused on what I could do for God. How I could work to serve God. How I could be good for God. Ways I could encourage others for God. 

The focus, the goal was good. But the route, the path, the understanding wasn't right. 

I was doing all of these things for God. 

But, the invitation is to do all of these things with God. 

When we do things for God, we think about how good we are because of what we have done. Over time we can easily can become enamored with ourselves and even become spiritually arrogant. We pride ourselves in our actions and whether we mean for it or not we have unintentionally served ourselves and not God.

The motivation of doing for takes God out of the equation and the only thing left is me. 

I didn't understand this for a long time. 

So, I worked and I did and I strove and encouraged and proved and read and focused all of myself on being for God. Over time, I felt that because I did things for God that He should love me, honor me, be proud of me. 

But this kind of relationship is not one of love or respect, it is one of indebtedness and bargaining. If I do this, then I will get that. 

What I found was that it was empty, lonely, and unfulfilling. 

With: to accompany. 

With: accompanied by. 

With: relationship. 

When I changed my thoughts, my prayers, my perspective and started thinking about doing things with God, serving with God, being with God, then my whole world changed. 

I was no longer working for alone, I was working with. 

The focus was off of me and on us. 

The honor and glory and love wasn't on me, it was on the relationship I was given. 

It is never wrong to do things for God, it just isn't the way it was meant to be. He did not call us to work for Him. He called us to work with Him, in relationship. 

I am not a master of the English language. I do not always understand prepositions and participles and suppositions and other like things. But I love words and respect the power they have within. And I know that shifting my whole focus from living for God to living with God has changed my life. 

It changed my life by teaching me about relationship, about surrender, about freedom, about love. 

I'm learning to live life WITH THE HOLY. Won't you join me?